I was reminded of this a few days ago, I met a lady to sell some of Ian's baby items. She started talking to me about how this was for her son's little boy and how her daughter has infertility issues. I proceeded to tell her that our son took us 7 years of heartache and infertility. He was born 4 weeks prior to 8 years of trying to have a baby. She stopped and we talked for a little bit about my struggles, and the small information she knew about her daughter's struggles. While I know she meant well, and so did my mom and our family and friends... they just didn't get it. I proceeded to tell her this, and said while we know you love us and want to help any way you can, until you've walked a day in our shoes, you unfortunately will never get it, and that's okay. We just want you to love and hold us when we need it.
I've also been so lucky these last few months to be "the Person" someone talks to during their infertility journey, I feel so blessed to be able to share their journey with them. That is what KCIA did for me... I have these amazing girls I work with side by side helping others through infertility. I know I've said it before, but I truly believe if it were not for KCIA, I would have never made it through this. They were my rocks!
At first my husband was anti talking about our struggles, but then I drug him KICKING and SCREAMING to the very first KCIA conference April 2011, such and eye opener and I'm told that quite often once I talk someone into coming to a conference. Then we went in April 2012, that summer I was asked to become a Board member, I said yes, and I do not regret it!! You meet so many amazing people and the friendships you make are like no other, you have a special bond that others will never understand, and I'm pretty thankful for the friendships I have through this. KCIA offers a yearly conference, we had our first 5K last year and on September 18-2016 our second 5K will take place, lots of small seminars and fundraisers through the year, and monthly support Group meetings, and on March 29th we will introduce the first Adoption Support group meeting. KCIA supports people at all stages in their journey. Including Secondary Infertility--- which is defined as the inability to become pregnant, or to carry a pregnancy to term, following the birth of one or more biological children. The birth of the first child does not involve any assisted reproductive technologies or fertility medications.
While I do not fall under secondary infertility, because Ian was and IVF baby, In order for my husband and I to have a second child we would have to use our frozen embryos, Spend $5,000-7,000, and open our hearts to the possibility it may not work, and if it doesn't that is the end of the road. I look at Ian and think maybe I should just be blessed that I have him, but in another breath, so badly want a sibling for him. For now that part of our journey is unknown, My heart is not ready to make that decision.
KCIA is planing our 6th Annual conference, Saturday April 30-2016. www.kcinfertility.org
We're unveiling the application process for the Family Building Grant at the 6th annual conference. We're offering TWO $5000 grants to be used towards the family building method of your choice!!!
The conference is completely free, and you will have the opportunity to meet local Infertility Doctors, Adoption Specialists, Acupuncture / Chiropractic / Massage Specialists! Come with a friend / family member/ sister / husband. We even have a breakout session for Men.
To register for conference: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/2016-family-building-conference-free-event-registration-21461796812
I urge you to share with family and friends you never know who is going through this journey alone, like we did until we opened up! I realize that not everyone realizes this is a disease.. No it's not life threatening like Cancer, but it is a disease and an expensive one, and a VERY heartbreaking one. You constantly walk away with nothing.
Infertility effects 1 in 8 people!
Infertility is defined as the inability to conceive after one year of unprotected intercourse (six months if the woman is over age 35) or the inability to carry a pregnancy to live birth.
Only 15 States!!
- Fifteen states have passed laws requiring that insurance policies cover some level of infertility treatment: Arkansas, California, Connecticut, Hawaii, Illinois, Louisiana, Maryland, Massachusetts, Montana, New Jersey, New York, Ohio, Rhode Island, Texas and West Virginia.
Nick and I are an open book and always willing to be there if you need us. Check out the rest of our blog, you can read our entire story.
Our prayers are always with you, and we would never wish this journey upon anyone, it's the most heart wrenching / expensive / emotional journey a couple will go through together. While I have not been through every aspect of Infertility, if I can't help you one of us has been through it and more than willing to help you.
If you want to help but do not know how... consider donating to KCIA so we can offer more Family Building Grants to families in need!
http://www.gofundme.com/
** Without Two Angels-- Nick and I would not have Ian. We had exhausted every penny, credit card, savings accounts we could. When two ANGELS approached us and said we don't think you are done, we would like to pay for another cycle, you pay for the medication, we'll pay for everything else. To give you an idea, the medications run $2,500-5,000 for ONE cycle and an IVF cycle before Medication runs $14,000-16,000, this does not include $500 if you have any additional to freeze.
Including what our Angels gave us, Ian is a $80,000 baby... while some of you may shake your head at that... I wouldn't trade my little miracle for the world. I'd do it all over again!
NO donation is too small, every little bit helps. I wish I had a million dollars at least to help those in KC. Did you know we had over 250 attendees at last years conference? And that's just those couples that are brave enough to be public about it.
